184 | TTT008 | Internal vs. External Storylines

May 27, 2024 Daryl McMullen

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184 | TTT008 | Internal vs. External Storylines Daryl McMullen

May 27, 2024

Welcome back!

Today's Topic: Internal vs. External Storylines

External storylines are fun to write
Internal storylines are hard to write
So which one wins?

// CHAPTER 1: EXTERNAL STORYLINES ARE FUN TO WRITE

To me - the External Storyline is all I knew - until recently.

When you think about telling a story - especially for a boy - it tends to be about action, adventure, car chases, and thrilling external events that keep the story charging forward.

And it's not like I think this way because I'm illiterate - or slow in some way. According to Lisa Cron, in her book Story Genius - this is what kids are taught from a very young age. In school - kids are given writing prompts - and almost 100% of them are external events. Requiring the student to write about them and continue to add to the external events and actions taking place in the scenario.

This is me - 100%

Growing up - my entire focus was on the external plot within books and movies. Here are a few examples...

Jurassic Park: Dinosaurs are created, they get smart, they get out and they eat people. Some of which survive to tell the tale.

Die Hard: A large skyscraper is taken hostage by a group of money-hungry terrorists. And one man, along with the help of a Twinkie-eating beat cop, foils the plans of the terrorists, and saves most of the building and the hostages.

Armageddon: When a large asteroid is discovered heading for Earth - a team of crackpots from a drilling company are asked to travel to the asteroid - plant explosives - and blow it up to save humanity.

See what I mean - when I look back there are so many books and movies like that - where all I remember is the external storyline.

Because it's fun and it's exciting.

And this is where I start to get confused.

Because I grew up fascinated by the external - and recently I've read information from The Story Grid, among other places, that suggest it is a valid way to write books and make movies. That you can tell a story with an external plot - without requiring a strong internal plot.

And one of the examples they point to is James Bond - both the books and the movie series.

According to them - .007 has no internal storyline. He is what he is - an arrogant British Agent, spy, assassin and womanizer. That's what he is at the beginning of the story - and that's what he is at the end.

It's an external storyline driven by plot twists and action alone. And they obviously work as they've made 25 of them - and it is a very successful franchise.

More recently I've found the show Reacher on Amazon Prime. Very similar. Jack Reacher lives a nomadic life, traveling around the world with nothing but a toothbrush and the help of kind citizens he runs into. However, he has a dark past - and has a skillset most people don't have. This typically leads him into some form of trouble. He gets involved, and winds up taking down very dangerous people with or without the help of law enforcement.

Jack Reacher is the same at the beginning of the series - and he's the same at the end.

Now - I know - there will be people who say, "That's fine that these books, movies and TV Shows exist - but they don't deserve the success they've found because they fail to follow my rules - that a good story has a driving internal storyline. A character arc that changes the Protagonist between page one and the end of the story."

And again - this is where I get a bit confused - because I see a LOT of people talk that way.

A LOT of the books I've read, podcasts I've listened to and YouTube videos I've watched say the same thing: That what really drives the story is the internal storyline - and that the only reason for the external storyline is to act upon the Protagonist throughout the story in such a way that brings about the internal change...

Wow...so is that true?

Do all of those movies I talked about fall flat because they focused solely on the external story?

Or do we live in a world where it can be both/and? Where we can write stories with strong external plots, and also include a strong internal storyline?

If I were to look at the extreme examples, I would probably see them as the following:

External Storyline: A story like James Bond - all action - all day long - no internal change. James is James at the beginning - and he's still James at the end
Internal Storyline: A contemporary fiction story where the Protagonist goes from being extremely hateful to extremely loving - simply by walking through life and having conversations with other people, and experiencing a few events capable of helping push him, or her in the new direction. But no real need for action, car chases, explosions, etc.

But I understand that this is the polarizing view. As a duality vs. a spectrum. Because it isn't that black and white...which we'll talk more about in Chapter 3.

// CHAPTER 2: INTERNAL STORYLINES ARE HARD TO WRITE

Now - the exact opposite is true for internal storylines. For me - they aren't fun to write - and they aren't easy to write.

Probably because I was never taught to write that way when I was growing up. And maybe I can blame a small bit of it on my gender - I don't know.

But at the end of the day - I should understand it. After all I went to school to be a therapist. I graduated with my MSW and worked for a while as a therapist, providing individual, family and group therapy. After that I supervised therapists doing the same thing in the Inpatient Hospital setting.

Based on my training, and experience - what part of internal storyline don't I understand?!

When I did therapy - I met with a client for the first time - and I got to know the Protagonist (if you will) in the initial phase. While working with them I eventually heard their back story, either all at one time or in flash backs during sessions. As the weeks went on - external forces acted upon the client - which required them to make choices based on the work we were doing. And eventually therapy ended. And the client was hopefully a different person when they walked out of my office the last time.

What is that if not an Internal Storyline? A Character Arc?

They walked into my office as one person - and they left changed - as another person - with a different world view.

At least if I did my job well - and they were willing to put in the work...

But in stories - books and movies - how does this work?

Well - based on my research - this is what writing a story with an Internal Storyline looks like:

If external is looking from the outside in
Internal is looking from the inside out
Instead of starting with your external plot and fitting all of your characters into that plot
You determine what your Protagonist wants and needs - and the change they will make throughout the story
Then you allow external things to cause that change
It's just a different way of looking at the story
You can and will have all sorts of external events - but they are added to the story in order to drive the changes in your Protagonist - helping them move closer and closer to the person you want them to be at the end of the story
Lisa Cron calls this the Third Rail - the thing that is literally driving the entire story:

According to Merideth Bond it can be summarized this way: "Through the plot of the story. The character’s actions and what happens as a result of those actions needs to ultimately teach the character that their misbelief is wrong. This is what the third rail is – the character’s internal struggle to learn that their long-held belief about either themselves or the world is wrong."

Now, according to Cron - this is mandatory part of all stories - every story needs the Third Rail
Again - I'm a little confused then about the whole James Bond thing - but we'll leave that alone for now...

So this is what the internal storyline is all about. Lisa believes in this so strongly - that she took a job in her local school system to help teach kids how to write this way. According to her research - kids have been taught ONLY to focus on external events in order to write stories. Writing prompts are all external, like, "If you woke up and the moon had disappeared - what would happen next."

An external event - that calls for more external exposition about external things that may or may not happen in the future.

According to her - you rarely see a writing prompt set up for the third rail. Something like, "June is an angry little girl - what would it take for her to see that - and be less angry?"

Sounds a bit less exciting right? But if your story has exciting events that happen to June - and over time these events move her from a place of anger to contentment - you have the makings of a great little story...

In her book - Cron helps walk us through the process of creating what she calls a Story Blueprint based on a strong third rail.

Like I said, I haven't finished the book - but so far - here are the steps I've read about:

Determine the What If:

This is the initial idea for your story
And it tends to be all external - like "What if terrorists take over a skyscraper in order to steal bonds from the CEOs vault?"
But this is the first step in changing things over to the internal storyline
Based on my understanding of the What If - here is my attempt based on my Alpha Protagonist:

“What if a man, mourning the loss of his marriage, and struggling to find purpose and meaning in his life was suddenly asked to lead a Task Force - charged with researching a device found below the Great Pyramid of Giza, in Egypt? A device that led to the discovery of other devices made out of elements that suggest our planet is connected to something much bigger than us. A connection that provides the ultimate purpose and meaning to the lives we live and the struggles we face.”

Now - there were elements in there about external events - but see the shift in the internal?
It lays the ground work for the Protagonist's character arc
You start with the internal struggle he is facing

Determine The Who - Who is my Protagonist:

This is basically the back story - what your Protagonist brings into the story on page 1
Here was my attempt:

“Jordan enters the story in a state of deep depression, and addiction after losing his wife through divorce. He is an educated man, top of his field, and yet none of that matters without his wife. He has lost hope and doesn’t see any purpose or meaning in life any longer. He doesn’t date and rarely goes out.”
It's a start - something I can add to before starting

The Why - the things driving the internal struggle:

Cron calls this the "dueling internal duo"
What the Protagonist wants (His desire)
And the misbelief or lie that keeps him from getting it (His fear)
As these two go back and forth throughout the story - the tension builds and the plot thickens...
Here was my attempt:

“Jordan wants his old life back. He misses his wife and wishes they could rekindle their marriage. He believes that she is the only one - and that without her - fears that life isn’t worth living. Because of this he is unable to see the good things all around him - and a higher purpose just around the corner.”

The Worldview:

According to Cron:

You need to plant the reader directly inside the Protagonists head as events unfold
Being there allows the reader into the Protagonists POV

Seeing what they see
Hearing what they hear
Not thinking what they think - but hearing the struggle - hearing the Protagonist struggle to figure out what's going on and what to do about it

The First Scene:

Next up Cron asks you to write your first scene
The scene is to be about the moment in time when your Protagonists mind shifted
And when the misbelief took root in his or her brain
From this point on - this misbelief will have colored your Protagonists thoughts and decisions up until your story begins

Turning Points:

Next, she asks that you come up with turning points for your story
Ideas - probably external storylines - that will move the Protagonist in the right direction

Forcing them to make difficult decisions - but decisions that will eventually create the internal change the story is about

Come up with 3 or more - pick the best one and write a scene

Create The Plot Line:

Next you develop some ideas around a global plot line for your book
From that list - select the one that checks these boxes:

Can this problem sustain the entire novel?

Can it build upon itself - and reach a climactic level?
Does this problem lead to a real-world, impending consequence your Protagonist will have to face?
Is there a deadline - a ticking clock that adds tension?

Will this problem force the Protagonist to make the internal change you came up with?

Will it cause the Protagonist to struggle with their misbelief?
Will the approaching consequence cost the Protagonist something emotionally?

Now develop "ticks" within that plot line:

Let's say 5-10 "ticks" or progressive complications - things that force the Protagonist to deal with their misbelief and move closer and closer to the intended change

Rearrange these "ticks" so that they grow in intensity

Develop The Novel Blueprint:

This is a scene by scene progression of the external plot
But of course it is driven by the internal struggle each external event triggers in your Protagonist
Cron then gets practical - which I love
She gives you a template called a Scene Card - for each scene in your book
It includes the following:

Scene #
Alpha Point: The external event - the cause and effect element that is required to keep the story moving
A couple Subplot lines: In case you're also moving a subplot forward in the same scene
Next you have a grid with 4 squares:

Top left: The Plot: Cause

What happens in the first half of the scene

Top Right: The Plot: Effect

The consequence of what happened in the first half of the scene

Bottom Left: 3rd Rail: Why it matters?

Why what happens in the first half of the scene matters to your Protagonist given their agenda

Bottom Right: 3rd Rail: Realization

The internal change to the character in the scene
AND the change it will have on the Protagonist (if not in the scene) when they find out
This realization requires a change in plan - the Protagonist's next move is typically a reaction to the previous realization

And then at the bottom the words "And so?"

What must happen next as a result of the scene
This needs to be a concrete, action-based event
Something very specific the Protagonist will do next as a result of the previous scene

And that's it!

That's how far I am into her book. So this isn't the end - but it is a lot to think about...

A very different approach from the Story Grid methodology I started with.

I'm starting to wrap my brain around it - but it is time consuming. And since my outline is mostly external storyline - it would take quite a bit to rework it based on this new direction.

I'm sure I've mentioned Mike before on the podcast. Mike and I hang out every now and then - we get coffee - talk about life - and also talk about our WIPs - our Works in Progress. Because we are both interested in writing - and we're both struggling through the first draft of our first project.

We both have Big Ideas and we've both jumped in and written a few chapters - only to get stuck and wonder where to go next.

But the other day - when we were hanging out - Mike finally got up the courage to call me out. He said, "Maybe you should stop doing all this research and reading all these books and just start writing! Because it seems like the more you read the more changes you make to your outline - and the more confused you get. And all of this keeps you from starting to write your story..."

Ouch - I know right?! Don't you hate it when you hear something like that? You want to start defending yourself - except you know they're right - and you're just stalling for some reason - maybe out of fear?

Fear that you aren't going to measure up?
Fear that you'll never finish the project?
Fear that there is a correct way to write a novel and you aren't sure if you've found it yet?

Ultimately - that might be where I'm at. As an Enneagram 1 I'm a perfectionist, and I have a fear of failure; a fear of people viewing me as incapable - or incompetent.

So the harder I work at finding the silver bullet - the less chance there is of writing something bad - right?

Well - maybe on some level - but there is also a line you shouldn't cross - a boundary you have to set so you don't keep researching for the rest of your life.

You have to figure out when enough is enough and then start writing...

// CHAPTER 3: SO WHICH ONE WINS?

As I've said - I'm still a little confused...

Before this book - I assumed there were two ways to write:

An externally driven story
Or an internally driven story

But after reading this book - I'm starting to see that if you really want to tell a great story - you need to start with the internal storyline first - and then add external events to drive the changes in your Protagonist.

So what does that mean for my story? I have a pretty detailed outline - mostly with external events driving the scenes.

Does that mean I have to go back through each scene and make it about the internal change in the Protagonist?

Or am I overthinking it?

Can I just go into each scene knowing that I'm documenting external events AND I also need to be aware of the fact that my Protagonist will deal with these events in a way that suggests there is an internal change happening?

No clue - but there has to be a way to do it so I'm not completely re-writing my entire outline.

I guess the best way to put is this: Regardless what I have in my outline as a "scene description" - I need to ensure I'm thinking about the following in each scene:

An external event (part of the main plot, and subplots)
And an internal change to my Protagonist

And...because I have multiple Protagonists (or high level characters) I'll need to ensure each of them have an internal storyline as well

But to finish things off - I wanted to bring up two more illustrations - ones I believe to be good examples of the way I'm hoping to write my story:

FIRST: I talked about James Bond being the quintessential non-changing Protagonist. But that's not entirely true. It is of the first 20 movies to be sure.

But when they brought Daniel Craig onto the set as the next 007 - something changed. Instead of the films being one-off, standalone movies where 007 was the same at the beginning and the same at the end of every film. This guy came with a back story - flashbacks to help us understand him. Then he grew to love one of the women he interacted with - a woman who lost her life - thereby changing his forever. Throughout the movies he struggles with physical pain and the loss of his normal accuracy. But this wasn't just in one movie - it was carried as an ongoing storyline - and internal storyline - for the next four movies. At the end of his 5 film marathon - he took one for the team - saving the world as usual - but also laying down his life for the ones he loved. Not something the 007 going into the series would have ever thought about doing.

So there you have it - an internal storyline - in a movie series traditionally driven by an external storyline.

SECOND: This is one of my all time favorites. The Jason Bourne Series.

To me - it's another great example of a series of books/movies with high energy and tons of action. On the surface people might want to lump it in with the legacy James Bond films as an externally driven story.

But when you look closer - you see how Jason Bourne goes through an amazing internal character arc.

He starts out with amnesia - and has to slowly gain back his memory with little flashbacks, and by following clues he finds to unlock even more information and memories about the man he was prior to the amnesia. During the series he has to come to terms with the fact that he was a killing machine - something he signed up for - something he appeared to be ok with back then. But at the same time there is an internal struggle about right vs. wrong. He was changing - wanting to be better - wanting to be a different person - but the external events kept forcing him back into his previous life. He developed a romantic interest - which was a HUGE change from his previous life. Relationships were not part of the job - as they would only keep you from being on the top of your game. As the series continues, Jason become more and more upset about the person he was, and the organization he worked for. And it became his life's work to take down the organization to in some small way pay for the things he had done for them.

As you can see - another great example of a story with both the high energy external storyline - but woven together with an amazing internal struggle within Jason Bourne.

It's comforting to me - watching these films - because I think that's what my story can be.

Yes - there will be a lot of high energy external events to drive the narrative. But at the same time I'm working on my Alpha Protagonist's story - his internal character arc. So that it can be a Third Rail - making it a more well rounded story.

Again, I use the term Alpha Protagonist - because my story is an Epic Adventure - with numerous settings, and multiple character groupings - suggesting that there may be multiple Protagonists.

And from everything I've read - in scenarios like these - each additional Protagonist must have their own internal storyline - character arcs that change based on the decisions he or she makes. And these decisions should bubble up to the Alpha Protagonist - ultimately impacting his or her decisions and the events he or she faces in the story.

Daunting to be sure. But that's the direction I need to head.

I think it will be helpful to flesh out the What If, The Who and The Why elements for the 3-4 higher level characters in my story. This way as I write I'll be able to keep those internal storylines front of mind in each scene.

I will focus on the Alpha Protagonist - but each of the other high level characters will be changing throughout the story as well - and their changes will impact his.

Let's Land the Plane:

Friends, as always - thanks for joining me again this week.

I hope this whole discussion about externally driven vs. internally driven stories was helpful.

I know it was for me - thinking it through from both sides - and making a decision on which way to go.

So I'll leave it there for now.

As for next week - I don't even know where to go next. We could talk about Characters and Settings. Or we could skip that altogether and move right into finishing up the outline for Book 1.

We'll have to see...

For now, have a great week everyone - and keep Transcending Human!

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